top of page

How will your life be when you're old? Sitting on a porch?

A Torch for the Porch


How do you picture retirement?

I had a discussion with an old friend a couple of years ago. We were both single and we got talking about post retirement and then... well, it's all in the video.

A Torch for the Porch

Full text plus the real life sequel below.

A Torch for the Porch

For some reason

I imagine retirement

As being immersed

In books, films,


And a rocking chair

On a porch

With half a decent view

Of trees and a valley

With a shotgun

To ward off real estate

And insurance agents.

They smell the decaying flesh

Of the old

Better than a

Starving Hyena.

Them and the kids.

I don’t need a partner

Just an old friend

I can trust

And maybe a sex doll

As friends and fondling

Never ends well

And I can always

Toss the doll

Out of bed afterwards.



Ironically my friend, who had been single for 8 years after a very turbulent marriage and post drama, met someone later that year. He had never been on a dating app. I said it's mostly a waste of time, as I had met plenty of people over a few years, and far too much texting with others, but it's worth having a shot.

He joined on the Friday. Matched with a lady on the Saturday. Met her on the Sunday. Deleted the app on the Monday.

Now they're planning to get married. That just doesn't happen! He deserved it too after what he'd been through.

Stock image

Coming soon,

My unproduced feature length screenplay, Travel Bug, based on some of my travels when I was young. Not for the feint of heart!

Have a good week.


Featured Posts
Recent Posts
Search By Tags
Follow Us
  • Facebook Basic Square
  • Twitter Basic Square
  • Google+ Basic Square
bottom of page